11 June 2008

10TH JUNE - A KIWI FRUIT IS FINE TOO

MORNONGING

I got a shower today! I even conditioned my hair (vegetarians, homosexuals and women, remember?), a brutally pointless activity when it's just going to get all tangled as soon as we start playing anyway. Maybe even at soundcheck if I feel particularly amorous towards music. We took a band trip to Tesco and all stocked up on food for the day, as we're not sure we're being fed later on. I got kiwi fruit and a bunch of other rad stuff. And plastic cutlery! Why we never thought to get cutlery before is so far beyond me that it's practically over there.
Today we're going back to London Village to play at Club Artrocker, which I believe is being held at the Buffalo Bar in Islington. I can never understand why there's a magazine called Artrocker. Every time I think of it, I visualise some seriously heavy dudes 'rocking' some real ground-zero 'art'. Those seriously heavy dudes invariably look like the members of Wolf Eyes.

LAAAATOR

We did a London again, mum. The show was really good fun, but let's talk about after it first, right? So here we are, in Colin's house, and we have the idea that we should play Grand Theft Auto IV in HD glory and 5.1 Surround Sound. So we play online and start talking to people, like 'Assasin Ant' (sic) - his name is spelled wrong on purpose because "the last three letters dude... it spells 'sin'" - and 'jake e c f c', meaning Exeter City, who lost the FA cup to Portsmouth. Colin is a Portsmouth fan. Cue amazing chat with Jakey-Boy and much goading. Turns out Jake isn't the witty type. I think I laughed a cough up and turned it into a nostril. All in all, a fantastic night filled with gunz and bombz and internet heroes - including Americans who told us about the two 9mm gunzz they owned in real life. Thanks, bro! And thanks, Colin! For being the raddest dude in the gold streets of Islington.
But anyway. What exactly is the deal with venues these days? We only seem to play places that you have to park a million lightyears away, then use our teleportation devices to get our gear inside. Last night, we dodgily parked on a pavement and whisked our brutal drumz into the Buffalo Bar. Our show was neat, but I couldn't find my voice for some reason. I think it's because I warmed up using a couple of things from the Zen Of Screaming DVD we 'got' (nudge nudge, wink wink).
Right now, Colin is playing GTA online, muttering "Scuse me, would anyone like to play internet with me?" at everyone. I think we're in the NME today, doing a human laughter all over paper magazeens. I'm not so sure, but, eh! Going to Birmingham today, maybe Johnny Foreigner will come see us and we can talk to their faces again. BIG YEAH!

5 comments:

MC CrabbyCrab said...

GAMELAAF.

Stinky Man said...

GAAAAMMMMEEEE LAAAAAFFFFFFFFF

Anonymous said...

man, that "colin" sounds like a total legend! i wish he was my brother.

Stinky Man said...

Hey Claire, GAAAMMEEELLAAAAFFFFF!!!!!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

GAMELAAF!!!!!!!




YEAHHH!!!